rainman15

Don't let the days go by, glycerine...

Thu, 19 Jan 2006 05:18:11 GMT

So, new semester. Lot of stress. So far, between school and work, I have little or no free time during the week. And yet.............there's something different. I feel a little more hopeful. I mean, different classes, with different people in em, it's like a new beginning, in a way. I still have some of the depression, pessimism, and confidence issues. But I don't know, there's just something different, I don't know what. Maybe it's from the three weeks off, since I was getting burned out, academically and socially. I almost feel like I have a new energy, although I don't let it show. I feel a little more hopeful, although it's a very cautious optimism.

I've been thinking a lot about myself lately. That's one of the good things about sitting around bored, you have more time to think. That's right, everyone's favorite neo-hippy is getting introspective. Anyway, I realized something. In the last couple years, things have happened that have made certain of my issues worse. Some of this was my fault, but a lot of it wasn't. Those of you who know me well know what events I'm talking about. Anyway, in my thinking, I reached a conclusion. I can't forgive some of the people who fucked me over in the past. I've tried, and I just can't do it. But the other day, someone said something to me. She told me that I can't let that shit make me bitter. Up till this point, I'd let it make me bitter, but I wasn't letting it affect the fact that I'm what most people apparently consider to be a nice guy, a good person, etc. But it was getting harder, because I was scared, I was letting the social paranoia I had from those issues and events control me. I can't just forget about those events either, they helped shape me, make me who I am. But what I can do, is control how much I let them affect me. Most of those people I've already cut out of my life. Because, the way I was before, I was close to becoming my own worst enemy, with those issues. It's gonna be hard, but I need to move beyond that shit. As I said, this doesn't mean forgiving those people, as quite frankly, I don't think some of them deserve to be forgiven. But I keep telling myself that if I trust other people too much, I have to be careful, cause they might do the same things some of those other people did. Because of that, my social life has been affected. I need to stop letting it affect how I interact with others. I'm still gonna be cynical, but I'm not gonna let it cripple me socially anymore. I can't. So any of you reading this, if I start reverting back to how I was, please, smack some fucking sense into me and tell me to suck it up. I can do this. Some other people I know told me recently that I'm stronger than I realize. I've started to think maybe that's true. I'm fucking tired of getting my legs kicked out from under me every time I get back up from a bad fall. But I'm not gonna stop getting up. I refuse to. Maybe I'm just being a stubborn bastard, but that's always been a problem with me when it comes to things I think are important.

05 was a mixed year. It had some ups, and a lot of downs. But for some reason, I have a good feeling about 06...

A long December and there's reason to believe
Maybe this year will be better than the last
I can't remember the last thing that you said as you were leavin'
Now the days go by so fast

And it's one more day up in the canyons
And it's one more night in Hollywood
If you think that I could be forgiven...I wish you would

The smell of hospitals in winter
And the feeling that it's all a lot of oysters, but no pearls
All at once you look across a crowded room
To see the way that light attaches to a girl

And it's one more day up in the canyons
And it's one more night in Hollywood
If you think you might come to California...I think you should

Drove up to Hillside Manor sometime after two a.m.
And talked a little while about the year
I guess the winter makes you laugh a little slower,
Makes you talk a little lower about the things you could not show her

And it's been a long December and there's reason to believe
Maybe this year will be better than the last
I can't remember all the times I tried to tell my myself
To hold on to these moments as they pass

And it's one more day up in the canyon
And it's one more night in Hollywood
It's been so long since I've seen the ocean...I guess I should
This song kinda reflects my current attitude about what lies ahead. It was, indeed, a long December, and there is at least a little reason to believe this year might be better.

Has our conscience shown?
Has the sweet breeze blown?
Has all the kindness gone?
Hope still lingers on.
I drink myself of newfound pity
Sitting alone in New York City
And I don't know why.

Are we listening
To hymns of offering?
Have we eyes to see
That love is gathering?
All the words that I've been reading
Have now started the act of bleeding
Into one.

So I walk up on high
And I step to the edge
To see my world below.
And I laugh at myself
As the tears roll down.
'Cause it's the world I know.
It's the world I know.
Another song reflecting my current attitude. Sometimes, when the bad shit gets overwhelming, you just need to get out, take a look around, to realize just how beautiful the world really is. Reminds me of home, during the summer, and every time I go back, it seems, when I get stressed, and just go for a drive, with no particular destination.

Made a meal and threw it up on Sunday
I've got a lot of things to learn
Said I would and I believe in one day
Before my heart starts to burn.

So what's the matter with you?
Sing me something new ... Don't you know
The cold and wind and rain don't know
They only seem to come and go, away

Times are hard when things have got no meaning
I've found a key upon the floor
Maybe you and I will not believe in the things we find behind the door

Stand By Me -- Nobody knows the way it's gonna be
Stand By Me -- Nobody knows the way it's gonna be
Stand By Me -- Nobody knows the way it's gonna be

If you're leaving will you take me with you
I'm tired of talking on my phone
But there is one thing I can never give you
My heart will never be your home
For all the people that are there for me, to listen to me and tell me everything's gonna be ok. For the ones who understand me, the friends who are there for me more than just as people to hang out with. For the people I care about, old and new, who return that to me. Without you people, I may not be where I am now, I may have crashed completely years ago.

There are things that i'd like to say
But i'm never talking to you again
There's things i'd like to phrase some way
But i'm never talking to you again

I'm never talking to you again
I'm never talking to you
I'm tired of wasting all my time
Trying to talk to you

I'd put you down where you belong
But i'm never talking to you again
I'd show you everywhere you're wrong
But i'm never talking to you again
For those people I talked about in the second paragraph. The ones who used me and fucked me over, and gave me all the fucking paranoia and trust issues I have now. For the ones I can't forgive, even if I'm gonna try my damnedest to forget em. For the ones who I can only hope get to read this, so they can see me tell them to go fuck themselves, and that I hope they burn in hell. Spiteful? Maybe. Bitter? You bet. Completely justified? Fuck yes. That little semi-rant felt good.

John Lennon Died For Your Sins

Sun, 08 Jan 2006 00:30:16 GMT

So, I haven't updated in about a month. This is due mostly to the fact that, when I was gone, the computer at home crashed, and everything had to be re-installed. This was a problem, cause I couldn't remember my LJ password. So, I'm back. I'm sure you've all missed me (I hope you all noticed the sarcasm dripping from that statement).

So..........Christmas was pretty good, I got some cds, a book, some movies, some gift cards, and, coolest of all...........a DRUM MACHINE!!! For those of you who don't know what a drum machine is, it's a machine that has different drum tones and beats that you can program in. It's basically a substitute for a real live person drumming. This could come in handy with the "Starting a band" thing.

So I saw King Kong, Munich, and the Producers while I was down there. All were good, although I think I liked Kong the best. Saw all three with people I don't see that often. Kong, I saw with my cousin Andrew. Munich and the Producers I saw with my friend Megan. Why her and I didn't hang out more before last summer, I don't know. I always have fun when we do, it seems.

So, yeah, back up at school now. Got all my books, put everything back where it's supposed to be, and I did something no one had done at all this school year: cleaned the god damn shower stall. Yup, I cleaned that and the sink. Toilet, I cleaned before I left for break. So I feel better now.

So, 2005 had its ups and downs. 2006, hopefully, will be better. Not that 05 had more ups than downs, but most of the downs were REALLY bad.

So I discovered a good thing about extreme boredom. It allows one to be more introspective. That's right, I was doing a lot of thinking about myself. About what I need to change. Problem is, some of it, I'm not quite sure how to change. My issues are so deeply rooted, they go back so far, it'll be hard.

You might be wondering, what does any of this have to do with the subject header thingy? The answer? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Couldn't think of any other header though.

Well, I guess that's it for now. I'll update again.........whenever.........

I'm a loser, baby, so why don't you kill me?

Fri, 09 Dec 2005 16:30:17 GMT

Sometimes, I feel like music is my only friend. It's always there for me, it never says anything bad about me, it's actually a pretty good friend. This is also why, in a way, I worship music. It doesn't tell me I'm going to hell. I don't pray to music though, I don't pray to anything. I just believe that John Lennon and Jimi Hendrix died for my sins.

Seriously though, music is a great thing. Music, often, is an outlet for emotions. This means that there is music for every feeling. For example, if you're very sad or depressed, there's 90s grunge, or 90s alt-rock, or some punk (although this really depends on the band/song. For example, Husker Du = good for depression. Clash = not really, although the fun music can help). However, one must be careful when picking depression music. While many bands that make depressing music leave one with a sense of catharsis, some are almost too depressing. This is especially the case with groups such as Joy Division, in which the singer killed himself. (Remember kids, suicide may be painless, but it's still bad for your health, and it's a bitch to recover from.) But overall, music has a very underestimated healing power.

For happy music, there is a much wider variety of options. There is classic rock, such as the Beatles (especially pre-Rubber Soul), hard rock, like the Who, Led Zeppelin, or the Rolling Stones, prog-rock (Pink Floyd, ELP, Moody Blues), and most punk (which, with its simple melodies and fun lyrics, make great party music. Metal can go either way, depending on the band and song in question. There are also bands like Modest Mouse.

Then there's political music. This is one of my personal favorite kinds, because it tends to be a little deeper, and make you think more. Perfect examples of this are Neil Young/CSNY, Pearl Jam (who also fall under grunge, and therefore, fit into two categories), the Clash, the Dead Kennedys, etc. Once again, a lot of punk bands can be found here.

That's right, I just did a whole Live Journal post about nothing but music. This makes me either A) really cool, B) a loser, or C) the coolest loser to ever live. I don't feel that I'm in a position to decide which one is the correct answer, since apparently, I often think more negatively of myself than I should.

Christmahanukwanzaka!!!

Fri, 09 Dec 2005 04:54:18 GMT

So, today, overall, was pretty good. Went to a Christmahanukwanzaka party with all my new friends on the north side. We also did the Secret Santa exchange. I got Eurotrip. It was pretty fun. Although, I did realize today just how awkward I am in large groups like that of people I don't know all THAT well. I was still kinda quiet there today, although I think I'm a little better. I'm not completely sure, but I think a lot of times it's because, for some reason, when in a group made up largely of people I don't know very well, I often feel as though no one really wants me there, and I was just invited to be nice, or something. I don't know why, there's not always even a basis for that, it's just a thing. Maybe it's self-esteem or something, I don't know. Maybe I'm just more fucked up in the head than anyone realized...

Today was also the 25th anniversary of John Lennon's death, so I have officially declared Dec. 8 to be Beatles day. This means I've been listening to the Beatles all day. Well, as much as I could, since my schedule today consisted of class, work, class, dinner, party. Which means I've had maybe three hours to myself at all today.

Not sure if I should go to my math class tomorrow or not. On the one hand, I probably should. But, there's gonna be a lot of snow, and it's a review for the final, which I'm already going to the study session for on Sunday.

So, yeah, I guess that's about it for now. Shall we get on to the quotes?

He seemed no different from the rest
Just a healthy, normal boy
His mother always did her best
And he was daddy's pride and joy
He learned to walk and talk on time
But never cared much to be held
And so alone he lives his life
Inside his solitary shell
As a boy he was considered somewhat odd
Kept to himself most of the time
He was lost in his imaginary world
But in every other way he was fine
He's a Monday morning lunatic
Disturbed from time to time
Lost within himself
In his solitary shell
A temporary catatonic
Madman on occasion
When will he break out
Of his solitary shell?
He struggled to get through his day
He was helplessly behind
He poured himself onto the page
Writing for hours at a time
As a man he was a danger to himself
Fearful and sad most of the time
He was drifting in and out of sanity
But in every other way he was fine
He's a Monday morning lunatic
Disturbed from time to time
Lost within himself
In his solitary shell
A momentary maniac
With casual delusions
When will he be let out
Of his solitary shell?
-Dream Theater, "Six Degrees of Inner Turbulene: VI. Solitary Shell"

Jesus tittyfucking CHRIST it's cold out!!!

Fri, 02 Dec 2005 17:46:41 GMT

So, I noticed I haven't done a real update to this damn thing since Sept. 11th. Some people were kinda bugging me to put something here, so I figured, why not?

So..............where to start? College life is getting better, I suppose. I've made some more friends, some better friends (you know who you are). I've been spending a lot of time with a girl I've become friends with who is basically the first girl I've ever completely trusted, which is nice. Not sure where things are gonna go, and she seems unsure about that as well. Had a little talk about it last night. I am not at liberty to discuss the details, but it went better than expected, although not as well as I'd hoped. Either way, we're still friends, and she's probably the best friend I have up here, which is cool.

Um..........what else? Oh yeah, I'm probably failing math. Those of you who know which math class I'm taking know why that's even worse than it'd normally be.

I'm finally moving on from Asia (with a lot of help from the girl mentioned two paragraphs ago). Still talk to her and stuff, but I don't know, we seem to have grown apart a bit lately. I guess it was inevitable, really. Oh well.

Today was one of those days where I just don't care about anything. That's not a good thing, it's really not. When I get emotionally numb like this, it's usually a bad sign.

Thought I'd start doing the whole quote of the day thing again (and yes, like always, it's mostly song lyrics), so...:

"Only in dreams
We see what it means
Reach out our hands
Hold on to hers
But when we wake
It's all been erased
And so it seems
Only in dreams."
-Weezer

"I'll be comin' home next year
I'll be comin' home next year
Everything's alright up here
If I come down
I'll be comin' home next year"
-Foo Fighters

"Down in a hole
And I don't know if I can be saved
See my heart
I decorate it like a grave
Oh, you don't understand who they thought
I was supposed to be
Look at me now,
A man who won't let himself be"
-Alice in Chains

"That's what life is, a series of down endings"
-Dante Hicks, "Clerks"

Thu, 10 Nov 2005 18:24:35 GMT

1. What time did you get up this morning? 8

2. Diamonds or pearls? Neither

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Good Night and Good Luck. Good movie, but most people my age would hate it

4. What is your favorite T.V. show? Daily Show

5. What do you usually have for breakfast? Omlette (Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, Case hall Omlettes...), some kinda potatoes, and pop

6. What is your middle name? Hunter (Ugh.)

7. Favorite cuisine? Um............

8. What foods do you dislike? Anything with mushrooms, onions, or tomato

9. What is your favorite chip flavor? Um, regular? Whatever you call a regular potato chip, I guess

10. What is your favorite CD at the moment? Husker Du- Zen Arcade. For some reason, it just.......speaks to me

11. What kind of car do you drive? Up here at State, I can't have one. Back home, 91 Plymouth Acclaim. Kinda maroon color. Piece of shit, but I love it anyway

12. Favorite sandwich? Whatever's there

13. What characteristic do you detest? Arrogance

14. Favorite item of clothing? ...They're clothes. Why would I have a favorite?

15. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation,
where would you go? Sweden

16. What color is your bathroom? White, I think

17. Favorite brand of clothing? See 14

18. Where would you retire to? Hell if I know

19. What was your most memorable birthday? 18th, cause it was right after coming back from LA

20. Favorite sport to watch? If I watched em, hockey

21. Furthest place you are sending this? This is Livejournal, I'm not sending it anywhere

22. Who do you least expect to send this back to you? See 21

23. Person you expect to send it back first? See 21

24. Goal you have for yourself? Right now, I'm trying not to set goals, it's just gonna lead to a letdown when I don't achieve them

25. When is your birthday? April 15th (tax day..........yay)

26. When is your Anniversary? I have nothing to celebrate an anniversary for yet

27. Are you a morning person or a night person? Neither, more of an afternoon/evening person, I guess. If I had to pick though, I'd say I'm more night than morning

28. What is your shoe size? 9 1/2

29. Pets? 2 cats and a dog at home, none here

30. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with
us? Um.........I wrote my first guitar song....does that count?

31. What did you want to be when you were little? Comic book writer, then a stand-up comic, then.........I can't remember, director maybe?

32. What are you today? A socially inept college student

33. What is your favorite candy? Reese's. Definitely Reese's

34. What is your favorite flower? They're flowers, what's the big deal?

35 What is a date on the calendar you are looking
forward to? I guess Thanksgiving, just cause I'll have no school for a few days.

Got this from Shaun

Fri, 14 Oct 2005 03:49:45 GMT

If you read this, even if we do not speak often,
comment with one memory of me.
It can be anything you want,
good or bad.
Just as long as it happened.
Then post this on your livejournal to see what
other people remember about you...

Tue, 04 Oct 2005 19:19:43 GMT

A - Age you lost your virginity? - N/A, unfortunately

B - Band listening to right now? - Smashing Pumpkins

C - Dream car? – Not a car person

D - Dads name? - Tom

E - Easiest person to make laugh? - Hmm.......Probably Rob, I guess

F - Food you miss most? – Any food I like, I can get up here too, so...

G - Any encounters with ghosts? – Not that I'm aware of

H - Person most hated at the moment? – I don't hate anyone

I - Interesting unknown fact about yourself? - I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve, so I don't think there is one

J - The first letter of the last person who broke your heart? - K

K - Kissing with eyes opened or closed? - Closed

L - Last time you did LSD? – Never

M - Most memorable moment you can think of in a minute? – My first kiss, at Asia's house

N - Nicknames? – "Dirty Hippy (tm)", "Squishy", I think that's about it

O - What's the most valued possession? – Hmmm.....Don't think I have one

P - Poison of choice? – What, like alcohol? After Saturday night, I guess Smirnoff Ice

Q - The last quote you heard: Don't hear many quotes, so...

R - What are you allergic to? - Penicillin

S - Song you sang last? – Bullet with Butterfly Wings, by Smashing Pumpkins

T - Time you woke up? – 7:40, I think

U - Fav. pair of underwear? – It's underwear, I don't have a favorite

V - Vegetable you hate most? – Onion

W - What are you the most afraid of? – Dying alone. Being unloved and unwanted my whole life.

X - X-rated love life? – Unfortunately, I don't have one

Y - Year you were born? - 1987

The Guy Code- Have YOU Broken It?

Sat, 01 Oct 2005 20:38:24 GMT

1. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever! Unless you actually marry her.

2. When questioned by a friend's girlfriend, you need not and should not provide any information as to his whereabouts. You are even permitted to deny his very existence.

3. Unless he murdered someone in your immediate family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 24 hours.

4. A best man's toast may not include any of the following phrases, "down in Tijuana", "one time when we were all piss drunk", or "and this girl had the biggest rack you ever saw".

5. You may exaggerate any anecdote told to your friends by 50% without recrimination, beyond that anyone within earshot is allowed to yell out "bullshit!". (exception: when trying to pick up a girl, the allowable exaggeration is 400%)

6. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

7. The minimum amount of time you have to wait for another man is 5 minutes. The maximum is 6 minutes. For a girl, you are required to wait 10 minutes for every point of hotness she scores on the classic 1-10 scale.

8. Bitching about the brand of free beverages in your buddy's refrigerator is forbidden. But gripe at will if the temperature is not suitable.

9. A friend must be permitted to borrow anything you own - grill, car, firstborn child - within 12 hr notice. Women or anything considered "lucky" are not applicable in this case.

10. Falling on a grenade for a buddy (agreeing to distract the skanky friend of the hot babe he's trying to score) is your legal duty. But should you get carried away with your good deed and end up getting on the beast, your pal is forbidden to ever speak of it.

11. Do not torpedo single friends.

12. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

13. Before dating a buddy's ex you are required to ask his permission. If he grants it, he is however allowed to say, "man, your gonna love the way she licks your balls"

14. Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to pick a Buffalo wing clean.

15. If a mans zipper is down, that’s his problem, you didn’t see anything!

16. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. (in fact, even remembering your best friends birthday is optional)

17. You must offer heartfelt condolences over the death of a girlfriends cat, even if it was you who secretly set it on fire and threw it into a ceiling fan.

18. While your girlfriend must bond with your buddies girlfriends with in 30 minutes of meeting them, you are not required to make nice with her gal pal's boyfriends- low level sports bonding is all the law requires.

19. Unless you have a lucrative endorsement contract, do not appear in public wearing more than one Nike swoosh.

20. When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may always ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.

21. If your girlfriend asks to set your friend up with her ugly, whiny, loser friend of hers, you must grant permission, but only if you have ample time to warn your friend to prepare his excuse about joining the priesthood.

22. Only in a situation of mortal danger or ass peril are you permitted to kick another member of the male species in the testicles.

23. Unless you're in prison, never fight naked. This includes men who aren't wearing shirts. If your buddy is outnumbered outmanned, or too drunk to defend himself, you must jump into the fight. Exception: if during the past 24 hours your friends actions have caused you to think "what this guy needs is a good ass wuppin", in which case you may refrain from getting involved and stand back and enjoy.

24. Friends don’t let friends wear speedos. Ever. Case closed.

25. Fives must be called at all times when getting out of your seat. If not, your seat is up for grabs. However, "house rules" may come into effect, in which case it is left up to the owner of the seat.

26. Shotgun can be called on anything where a shotgun applies., as long as you are in eyesight of the object, or it is at a reasonable time.

27. When picking players for sports teams it is permissible to skip over your buddy in favor of better athletes- as long as you don’t let him be the last sorry son of a bitch standing on the sideline.

28. If you ever compliment a guy's six pack, you better be talking about his choice of beverage.

29. Never join your girlfriend in ragging on a buddy of yours, unless she is withholding sex, pending your response.

30. Phrases that may never be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
"Yeah, baby, push it!"
"Come on, give me one more, harder!"
"Another set and we can hit the showers"
"Nice ass! Are you a Sagittarius?"

31. Never hesitate to reach for the last beverage or pizza, but not both. That’s just mean.

32. Never talk to another man in the bathroom unless you are on equal footing: both urinating, both waiting in line for all other situations an "I recognize you" nod will do just fine.

33. Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch nearby, hang up if necessary.

34. You can not rat out a friend who show's up to work or class with a massive hangover, however you may: hide the aspirin, smear his chair with limburger cheese, turn the brightness on his computer way up so he thinks its broken, or have him paged every seven minutes.

35. If you catch your girl messing around with your best friend, let your states crime of passion laws be your guide.

36. If your buddy is trying to hook up with a girl, you may sabotage him only in a manor that gives you no chances of getting any either.

37. Before allowing a drunken friend to cheat on his girl, you must attempt one intervention. If he can get up on his feet, look you in the eye, and deliver a "fuck off" then you are absolved from all responsibility. Later on it is ok that you have no idea what his girlfriend is talking about.

38. The morning after you and a babe, who was formerly "just a friend", go at it, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason not to jump on her again before there is a discussion about what a big mistake it was.

39. If a buddy has lint, an eyelash, or any other foreign object on his hair or face, under no circumstances are you permitted to remove it. However an appropriate hand gesture may be made to make him aware of it.

40. An anniversary is recognized on a yearly basis, under no circumstances will anything be celebrated in an interval other than a year

41. When using a urinal in a public restroom, a buffer zone of at least one urinal will exist at all times. If the only empty urinal is directly next to an occupied on, then you are still required to wait. (Exception: at a sporting event where a line has formed to use the pisser)

42. When coming to a room which you know is occupied by your friend and possibly another girl, you must knock and wait for an adequate response. If no response occurs, and the door is locked, a 10 minute period is required before knocking again.

43. The only time dicking over a buddy for a girl is legal, is when the girl ranks a 8 or above on the 1-10 scale. (exception: a girl may rank from 5-7, as long as there is oral sex involved).

44. A mans gotta scratch what a mans gotta scratch. This applies to picking as well. Let the man be.

45. No man shall ever watch any of the following programs on TV:
Figure skating
Men's gymnastics
Any sport involving women (unless viewed for sexual purposes)

46. If you accidentally touch or brush against any part of another man below the waist, it is an understood accident, and NO apologies or any reference to the occurrence is necessary.

47. No man shall spend more than 2 minutes in front of a mirror. If more time is required, a three minute waiting period must be allowed before returning to the mirror.

48. Any dispute lasting any longer than 3 minutes will and must be settled by rock, paper, scissors. There is no argument too important for this determining method.

49. No man will ever willingly watch a movie in which the main theme is dancing, and if a man shall happen to view such a movie it is only acceptable if its with a girlfriend.

50. Only acceptable time when a man is allowed to cry:
when a heroic dog dies to save his master.
after being struck in the testicles with anything moving fast than 7 mph.
When your date is using her teeth.
The day Anna Kornikova chooses a husband.

51. If a bet is made, and the challenge is completed, then the bettor may recoup his money by immediately completing a more daring challenge. If he refuses the challenge or chooses not to propose one, then and only then, must the money be paid.

52. Masturbate often. (exception: if your roommate is due back within the hour)

53. If a hot girl shall happen to pass by while you are in an arms reach of your buddy, you must, and will, tap him on the shoulder to make him aware of the babe.

54. A man's shoes may not intentionally match any other article of clothing on his body.

55. No comment shall ever be made to a man about how much he is sweating. In fact, there is no need bring notice to any body part which he may be sweating from.

56. No man shall ever allow anyone to speak ill of The Simpsons or any Rocky movie. (Exception: Rocky V)

57. You have not made any mistake if you find that there are extra pieces after reassembling or assembling an object. In fact, you have just found a way to make that object more efficient.

58. There are is never an occasion in which any shirt without buttons may be tucked in. (Exception: when you are participating in a organized sporting event)

59. Unless you are under the age of 11 or wearing a bathing suit,, DON’T wear whitey tighty's. It still escapes all reasoning as to why they even make them in adult sizes.

60. Any object thrown with reasonable speed and accuracy, MUST be caught.

61. No man shall ever keep track of, or count, the amount of beers he has had in a night.

62. Under no circumstances may two non-related men share a bed or anything which can be perceived as a mattress.

63. In an empty room, car, ect., a man can not ask another man if he is mad because he isn’t talking.

64. If you jiggle more than twice, your playing with it.

65. A man shall never help another man apply sun tan oil.

66. The guy who wants something the most is responsible for getting it.

67. If your friend says "Lick my nuts" as a way to put you down, don't try to be funny by saying "OK" and moving your head towards his crotch, two homosexual references in a row are just plain scary...

68. If you say ouch, you are a pussy!

69. It is the God given duty of every man to assist any other man that may be in need of assistance in obtaining every guys dream (threesome with two girls)

* with every set of laws, there are appropriate punishments. If any man shall happen to break any one of these codes, he will be found guilty, and will, for 24 hours from the time of the violation, be considered NOT A MAN. During this time he will not be referred to in any masculine way, and he shall bear the name Princess.

Fill it in, please

Tue, 27 Sep 2005 19:29:52 GMT

fill this in
1. Have we kissed?:
2. Do you want to?:
3. What would you like our relationship to be?:
4. Have we dated?:
5. Did you like it?:
6. Do you want to date?:
7. Are we close friends?:
8. Would you be here if I needed you?:
9. Are you attracted to me?:
10. Mentally, sexually, or both?:
11. Do you love me?:

Would you..
31. Share chocolate with me?:
32. Spend a weekend with me?:
33. Alone?:
34. Hook up with me?:
35. Kiss me?:
36. Care if I ran away?:
37. Care if I died?:
38. Miss me if I left?:
39. Hang out with me?:

What would you do if..
40. I kissed you?:
41. You found out I was missing?:
42. You found out I was in the hospital?:
43. You found out I was dead?:
44. I cried?:
45. I asked you for help?:
46. I told you I loved you?:
47. I told you I hated you?:
48. Someone told you I wanted you to kiss me?:
49. Someone told you I had a crush on you?:

In the last week have you..
50. Wanted to kiss me?:
51. Wanted to see me?:
52. Talked to me?:
53. Wanted to tell me you loved me?:
54. Wanted to spend alone time with me?
55. Wanted to get to know me better?:
56. Thought about me?:
57. Missed me?:
58. Wanted me?:
59. Seen me?:
60. Kissed me?:

Have I..
61. Kissed you?
62. Hugged you?
63. Told you I loved you?:
64. Made you happy?:
65. Made you sad?:
66. Made you angry?:
67. Made you feel better if you were upset?:

Are you..
68. Happy you know me?:
69. Going to post this is so I can answer it and reply to you

Sun, 25 Sep 2005 12:50:14 GMT

Leave your name and
1. I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.
3. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me.
4. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you.
5. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
6. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.
7. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal. You MUST

Fri, 26 Aug 2005 03:35:32 GMT

Place an "x" next to the things you've done (in the parenthasis on the
left people!)

( ) smoked a cigarette
( ) smoked a cigar
( ) crashed a friends car
(x) been in love
( ) been dumped
( ) shoplifted
( ) been fired
( ) been in a fist fight
( ) snuck out of my parents house
(x) had feelings for someone who didnt have them back
( ) been arrested
( ) made out with a stranger
( ) gone on a blind date
(x) lied to a friend
(x) had a crush on a teacher
( ) been to Europe
(x) skipped school
(x) seen someone die
(x) have a crush on one of my internet friends
(x) been to Canada
(x) been to Mexico
(x) been on a plane
(x) seen the Rocky Horror picture show
( ) thrown up in a bar
( ) purposely set myself on fire
( ) eaten Sushi
( ) been snowboarding
(x) met someone in person from the internet
( ) been moshing at a concert
( ) been in an abusive relationship
(x) taken painkillers
(x) love someone or miss someone right now
(x) laid on your back and watched the clouds go by
(x) made a snow angel
( ) had a tea party
( ) flown a kite
(x) built a sand castle
(x) gone puddle jumping
( ) played dress up
(x) jumped into a pile of leaves
(x) gone sledding
( ) cheated while playing a game
(x) been lonely
( ) fallen asleep at work/school
( ) used a fake id
(x) watched the sunset
( ) felt an earthquake
(x) touched a snake
(x) slept beneath the stars
(x) been tickled
( ) been robbed
(x) been misunderstood
( ) pet a reindeer
( ) won a contest
(x) ran a red light
( ) been suspended from school
(x) been in a car accident
(x) had braces
(x) felt like an outcast
( ) eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
(x) had deja vu
(x) hated the way you look
( ) witnessed a crime
( ) pole danced
(x) questioned your heart
( )been obssesed with post-it notes
( ) squished barefoot through the mud
(x) been lost
(x) been to the opposite side of the country
(x) swam in the ocean
(x) felt like dying
(x) cried yourself to sleep
( ) played cops and robbers
( ) recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers
(x) sung karaoke
( ) paid for a meal with only coins
(x) done something you told yourself you wouldnt
( ) made prank calls
( ) laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
( ) caught a snowfalke on your tongue
( ) danced in the rain
( ) written a letter to Santa Claus
( ) been kissed under the mistletoe
( ) watched the sun rise with someone you care about
(x) blown bubbles
( ) made a bonfire on the beach
( ) crashed a party
(x) gone rollerskating
(x) had a wish come true
( ) humped a monkey
( ) worn pearls
( ) jumped off a bridge
( ) screamed penis in public !!)
( ) ate dog/ cat food
( ) kissed a mirror
(x) sang in the shower
( ) have a little black dress
( ) had a dream you married someone
( ) glued your hand to something
( ) got your tongue stuck to a flag pole
( ) kissed a fish
( ) worn the opposite sex's clothes
( ) been a cheerleader
( ) sat on a roof top
(x) screamed at the top of your lungs
( ) done a one-handed cartwheel
( ) talked on the phone for more than 6 hours
(x) stayed up all night
(x) didnt take a shower for a week
( ) picked and ate an apple right off the tree
( ) climbed a tree
( ) had a tree house
(x) believed in ghosts
( ) have more than 30 pairs of shoes
( ) worn a really ugly outfit to school just to see what others say
( ) gone streaking
( ) played strip poker
( ) played chicken
( ) pushed into a pool/lake with all your clothes on
( ) been told you were beautiful by a complete stranger
( ) broken a bone
(x) been easily amused
( ) caught a fish and ate it
( ) caught a butterfly
(x) laughed so hard you cried
( ) cried so hard you laughed
( ) mooned or flashed someone
( ) had someone moon/flash you
( ) cheated on a test
( ) had a Britney Spears CD
(x) forgotten someones name
(x) slept naked
( ) French braided someones hair
( ) grown a beard

What do I put if I can't think of a subject?

Mon, 01 Aug 2005 02:30:58 GMT

So, I noticed that my last entry was a downer, so I figured I should update this thing.

Well, things are better between me and Asia, at least for the time being. It'll be interesting, I think, to see how long it lasts.

So, we did, possibly, our last movie night till next summer tonight. Me, Rob, Qasim, Qasim's new girl Crystal, and Anthony. Good times. Too bad Matt and Shaun couldn't go.

I got two books I've gotta read before I go off to college. Fun. Actually, one of em, the Kite Runner, I wanna read, cause I've heard nothing but good things. The other, though, is Shakespeare. Bleh.

I've been bored most of the summer, but I'm getting used to it.

So, yeah, that's all the major things I can think of right now, so I guess I'm done for now.

Quote of the day:
"Do you remember when the first snowfall fell?
And summer barely had a snowball's chance in hell
Is this your celebrated summer?
Is this your celebrated summer?
Do you remember when the first snowfall fell?
Was that your celebrated summer?"
-Husker Du, Celebrated Summer

"I just want a lover like any other
What do I get?
I only want a friend who'll stay to the end
What do I get?
What do I get?
Oooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhh what do I get?
I'm in distress I need a caress
What do I get?
I'm not on the make I just need a break
What do I get?
What do I get?
Oooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh what do I get?
I only get sleepless nights
Alone here in my half-empty bed
For others things turn out right
I wish it'd only happen to me instead
What do I get?
Oooooohhhhhhhh what do I get?
What do I get? No love
What do I get? No sleep at night
What do I get? Nothing that's nice
What do I get? Nothing at all, at all, at all, at all"
-Buzzcocks, What Do I Get

Mon, 20 Jun 2005 03:06:42 GMT

Fuck Fuck Fuckity Fuck

Fuck me!
Fuck me sideways!
Fuck me gently with a chainsaw!

GodDAMMITMotherFUCKERSonofaBITCH!

Now that I got that outta my system, an update is coming soon, and probably not a good one

Fri, 03 Jun 2005 04:20:14 GMT

So, let's see, last time I posted more than one sentence, that wasn't a survey or the like, was back in April. I figure that means it's time to update again. Ideally, I'd like to put something at least once a month, but sometimes, not much actually happens.

Anyway, so what's happened since then? Um.......let's see...saw Star Wars, it kicks ass! Got pissed off at Kate, for not bringing my movies back, and I kinda went off on her. Oddly enough, it felt really good.

But the main event of last month, is that I'M OUTTA SCHOOL NOW!!! Graduation's tomorrow night. After that, I honestly don't know if I'll ever wanna go back to that place.

I wish I could give an Asia update, but there's really no update to give, unfortunately. Basically, all the plans we make seem to end up getting fucked up. It's looking like she won't be able to do the relay this weekend, and she may or may not have gotten the invite to my graduation party (her mom would've gotten to it before her, and very possibly may have like, hidden it or something, from what Asia said), and she probably won't be able to go anyway. Dammit, all my plans to see her don't work! WHY?!!! Her and Jaret are going up to Camp Dearborn this summer for a week, and she wants me to come too, so hopefully that'll work out, but I don't know. I can't help but feel like her and I are growing apart, cause we never get to see each other.

Lookin' for a job now. If any of you guys reading this can hook me up, it'd be much appreciated.

I've gotten really into the Rolling Stones in the past week or so. I burned their Forty Licks compilation (basically a greatest hits thing), and it's awesome. They also did the only song I can remember ever hearing that moved me so much I almost cried the first time I heard it (not proud of that, but then again, I've admitted a lot of things before that I wasn't proud of, why should this be different?). It's called Angie. I don't know why it has that effect on me, I think it may be because, the lyrics, in a way, remind me of my situation right now. As much as I hate to admit that.

I'd put the whole "quote of the day" thing, like I normally do, but honestly.........I got nothin'.

Sat, 28 May 2005 05:07:41 GMT

Six songs that I love and/or mean a lot to me (In no particular order):
1. Pink Floyd- Wish You Were Here: This song always evokes a lot of emotions in me, depending on my life situation at the time. Usually it's emotions like love and things like that.
2. Rolling Stones- Wild Horses: My favorite Stones song, and my favorite love song. Well, I think of it as a love song anyway. It's about a guy who would do anything for the girl he loves, and wild horses couldn't drag him away, I think that's a love song.
3. Joy Division- 24 Hours: Depressing, but cathartic somehow. The ultimate depression song. I would never listen to it while depressed, but still, great song.
4. Weezer- Suzanne: Reminds me of a very special person in my life right now (you know who you are.).
5. The Who- Baba O'Riley: Also known as "Teenage Wasteland", the all-time greatest Who song, and one of the all-time great rock songs. Just a classic teen angst song.
6. Led Zeppelin- Over the Hills and Far Away: Most calming song ever, with a beautiful acoustic intro, and some of Robert Plant's all-time best vocals. I love playing this song when I'm depressed or stressed out, it just makes me feel better.

Tag 5 people to complete this next. You're it:
1. Justin
2. Asia
3. Steve
4. Kate
5. Kasey

Thu, 19 May 2005 00:28:30 GMT

Post anonymously, say anything. How much you hate me, how much you love me, how much you can't stand me, how much more you want to spend time/talk with me. How ugly I am. whatever. Be honest. Post this in your livejournal to find out what people think about you.

Tue, 17 May 2005 02:42:44 GMT

A - AGE: 18
B - BAND LISTENING TO MOST RECENTLY: Dead Kennedys, Husker Du, Weezer, Metallica
C - CRUSH: I don't need a crush, I've got the girl I had a crush on
D - DAD'S NAME: Tom (Step-dad's name: Tony)
E - EASIEST PERSON TO TALK TO: Hmmmmmmm..........Asia. Rob's at a close second though
F - FAVORITE BAND: REM, Led Zeppelin, Weezer, too many more to count...
G - GUMMY BEARS OR WORMS: Neither
H - HOMETOWN: Livonia, MI
I - INSTRUMENT: Voice, Guitar
J - JUICE: Lemonade
K - KIDS: Maybe someday, if I can ever get laid, and get a girl to marry me and stuff. Big ifs, both of those...
L - LONGEST CAR RIDE: Hmmm.......probably down to Pennsylvania for a family reunion
M - MOM'S NAME: Sue (Step-mom: Frances)
N - NUMBER OF SIBLINGS: None
O - ONE WISH: Can't just pick one, so I'll go with my two big ones: for my mom to get over her cancer, and for me and Asia to be able to be together
P - PHOBIA(S): Rejection, Emotional abandonment, Betrayal, that's about it right now...
Q - QUOTE: "What we've got here is....failure......to communicate" Story of my life right now
R - REASON TO SMILE: Asia. Only reason I need
S - SOMETHING YOU REGRET: Being born on tax day...
T - TIME YOU WAKE UP: Weekdays: 7:30, Weekends: 9 or 10
U - UNKNOWN FACT ABOUT ME: Ummmmmm...........I got nothin' for this right now. Anything I could think of, there's at least one person who knows it. Maybe later I'll have something
V - VEGETABLE YOU HATE: Anything except corn or carrots or potatoes. Not a veggie eater
W - WORST HABIT(S): Getting paranoid and having a hard time trusting people
X - X-RAYS YOU'VE HAD: Leg X-ray (when I dislocated my knee cap), and dental X-rays
Y - YUMMY FOOD: Pizza
Z - ZODIAC SIGN: Aries

Star Wars

Mon, 09 May 2005 21:56:56 GMT

STAR WARS TICKETS!!! FOR FREE!!!! I GOT TWO STAR WARS TICKETS FOR FREE!!!!

Variety Show Suckiness

Fri, 29 Apr 2005 03:32:46 GMT

So, yeah, I was in the Variety Show tonight. I did pretty damn good, played the song almost perfectly. I did so awesome, all the settings on the amp were perfect for the effects and everything. I kicked all kinds of ass.

Then, I heard "TURN IT UP!" I realized my amp was turned down too low! This was about 3/4 of the way into the song, mind you. I turned it up anyway, and played the last 1/4 better, but I was pissed at myself.

So Asia said she'd try to hang out with me this weekend, even if it's for an hour or so, cause she said she needs to see me, which is nice to hear. I e-mailed her tonight to ask if she knew yet if she could see me, didn't get an answer. Hopefully I'll find out tomorrow. God, it's so damn hard to figure this shit out now that she has no phone.

But, yeah, I'm tired, and Family Guy's on, so I'm gonna stop writing now.

FUCK!!!

Fri, 22 Apr 2005 03:15:57 GMT

You know, it's weird, I feel like, if I could just be with her, I'd be completely happy for the first time in a long time. But I'm just starting to realize and accept that it probably won't happen, at least not any time in the forseeable future. And, you know, if it was cause she didn't like me, that'd be kinda upsetting, but it'd be fine. But to me, what makes it worse is that she does want me, but she has as little control over it as I do. I don't know what to do here, but I can't give up yet. I need to keep hoping, for me if no one else. Cause right now, with this situation and other recent developments, hope is the only thing keeping me going. And to make matters worse, I found out today Asia (the "she" I was reffering to, for those of you who don't know) can't go to prom with me, either. Oddly enough, it's not cause of her mom this time, it's cause of shitty luck (and prom's on Friday the 13th, shouldn't be a surprise). So, yeah, now I'm not going, cause I now have absolutely no reason to. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuckity fuck. Ok, I'm done

Quotes of the Day:
"Who knows how long I've loved you?
You know I love you still.
Will I wait a lonely lifetime?
If you want me to, I will."
-The Beatles, "I Will"

"So look up.
Take it away. Don't look down
The mountain.
If the world isn't turnin', your heart won't return
Anyone, anything, anyhow.
So take me, don't leave me.
Take me, don't leave me.
Baby, love will come through, it's just waitin' for you."
-Travis, "Love Will Come Through"

"I wish I was a neutron bomb, for once I could go off.
I wish I was a sacrifice, but somehow still lived on.
I wish I was a sentimental ornament you hung on
The Christmas tree I wish I was the star that went on top.
I wish I was the evidence, I wish I was the grounds
For 50 million hands upraised and open towards the sky.
I wish I had a sillouhette, someone who waited for me.
I wish I was as fortunate, as fortunate as me.
I wish I was a messenger and all the news was good.
I wish I was the full moon shining off a Camaro's hood.
I wish I was an alien at home behind the sun.
I wish I was a souvenir you kept your house key on.
I wish I was the pedal break that you depended on.
I wish I was the verb 'to trust' and never let you down.
I wish I was a radio song, the one that you turned up.
I wish, I wish, I wish, I wish,
I guess it never stops..."
-Pearl Jam, "Wishlist"

Mon, 11 Apr 2005 04:09:43 GMT

I got this from Crystal's journal

I AM: Scott

I WANT: Two things, 1.my mom to get rid of her cancer, 2.to be with Asia
I HAVE: ........stuff.......
I WISH: My mom didn't have cancer, and that I could be with Asia
I Miss: Asia, but that's cause I'm addicted to her
I HATE: right-wing religious extremists, girls that like to manipulate people and play with emotions (you know who you are)
I FEAR: death, above-mentioned right-wing religious extremists, but most of all, emotional abandonment and being alone
I SEARCH: ...I'm supposed to be searching? DAMMIT, people need to tell me these things!
I WONDER: if anyone really cares about what I put here
I REGRET: Lots of things
I AM NOT: an attractive man (I don't think so anyway, some people would disagree)

I DANCE: Never, unless I'm forced to
I SING: When I can, with a very mediocre voice only really suited for rock
I CRY: Not very often
I AM NOT ALWAYS: thoughtful of what I say

I WRITE: damn good persuasive essays, but shitty songs!
I NEED: emotional acceptance
I SHOULD: be less dependent on the above-mentioned need
MY FATHER THINKS I AM: Apparently, too stupid to be able to make my own decisions about college shit
MY MOTHER THINKS I AM: A great person, or so she tells me
I GET EMBARRASSED WHEN: I do something stupid
MAKES ME HAPPY: Being with people I love or care about
UPSETS ME: when people I care about are upset
THE PRETTIEST FEMALE YOU KNOW: Asia
THE PRETTIEST MALE YOU KNOW: Guys aren't pretty, even the hottest guys look like cavemen, to some extent
THE WEIRDEST PERSON YOU KNOW: Justin, in the best possible way
THE LOUDEST PERSON YOU KNOW: Shaun
THE SEXIEST PERSON YOU KNOW: Asia
YOUR CLOSEST FRIENDS: Rob, Shaun, probably Asia, but I consider her more than a friend, so...
THE PERSON THAT KNOWS THE MOST ABOUT YOU: Rob, Shaun, probably Asia
YOUR CRUSH: Asia (although, if it's mutual, is it still a crush?)
SIGN: Aries

YES OR NO
You keep a diary: Not unless this counts
You like to cook: I would if I could
You have a secret you have not shared with anyone: Most likely, don't know what
You're in love: I believe so
You set your watch a few minutes ahead: Don't wear watches
You bite your fingernails: Nope
You believe in love: Definitely
Take a shower everyday: Yup
Think you know you've been in love: Think I am right now
Want to get married: Eventually
Have any tattoos/where?: Nope
Piercing/where?: Nope
Get motion sickness: No, used to
Get along with your parents: For the most part

FAVORITES
NUMBER: They're numbers, there's no special ones
COLOR: Black
DAY: Any day that's a good day for me
MONTH: See above

SONG: Right now, probably either Led Zeppelin- Over the Hills and Far Away, or Oasis- Wonderwall
FOOD: Pizza
SEASON: They're seasons, what's the big deal?
SPORT: Hockey, although I'm not a sports person
DRINK: Cherry Coke, Egg Nog
VEGGIE: Potatoes? Are those vegetables?

PREFERENCES
CUDDLE OR MAKE OUT? Well, seeing as how I've never gotten to do either one, really, I'd be the wrong one to ask
CHOCOLATE MILK, OR HOT CHOCOLATE? Choc. Milk
MILK, DARK, OR WHITE CHOCOLATE? Dark
VANILLA OR CHOCOLATE? Chocolate

IN THE LAST 24 HOURS, HAVE YOU....
CRIED? Nope
HELPED SOMEONE? No, but I tried
BOUGHT SOMETHING? No
GOTTEN SICK? No
GONE TO THE MOVIES? Not in the last 24 hours, but a little before then...
SAID "I LOVE YOU"? Yeah
WRITTEN A REAL LETTER? Who does that anymore?
MISSED AN EX? If I had an ex to miss, I'm sure I probably woulda
WRITTEN IN A JOURNAL? I am now
TALKED TO SOMEONE YOU CRUSH ON? Yeah
HAD A SERIOUS TALK? Yeah
MISSED SOMEONE? Yeah
HUGGED SOMEONE? No

Tue, 01 Mar 2005 02:01:57 GMT

WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF:
» I committed suicide:
» I said I liked you:
» I kissed you:
» I lived next door to you:
» I started smoking:
» I stole something:
» I was hospitalized:
» I ran away from home:
» I got into a fight and you weren't there:

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY:

» Personality:
» Eyes:
» Face:
» Hair:
» Clothes:
» Mannerisms:

[1] Who are you?
[2] Are we friends?
[3] When and how did we meet?
[4] How have I affected you?
[5] What do you think of me?
[6] What's the fondest memory you have of me?
[7] How long do you think we will be friends or enemies?
[8] Do you love me?
[9] Have I ever hurt you?
[10] Would you hug me?
[11] Would you kiss me?
[12] Would you fuck me?
[13] Are we close?
[14] Emotionally, what stands out?
[15] Do you wish I was cooler?
[16] On a scale of 1-10, how attractive am I?
[17] Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
[18] Am I loveable?
[19] How long have you known me?
[20] Describe me in one word.
[21] What was your first impression?
[22] Do you still think that way about me now?
[23] What do you think my weakness is?
[24] Do you think I'll get married?
[25] What about me makes you happy?
[26] What about me makes you sad?
[27] What reminds you of me?
[28] What's something you would change about me?
[29] How well do you know me?
[30] Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
[31] Do you think I would kill someone?
[32] Are you going to put this on your journal and see what I say about you?

Tuesday

Tue, 15 Feb 2005 20:55:43 GMT

So, there's a girl I'm really into now that I didn't talk about before, so I'm gonna do that now.

Her name's Asia, she's 15, and she's fucking AMAZING. She seems like she's really into movies, like me, she really likes music, and likes the same kinds of music as me, AND she can play, which is just really cool, not to mention sexy, for some odd reason. So yeah, we seem to have a lot in common. She's basically come out and told me she likes me, which is also cool. Only bad thing is, she's not allowed to date, which is really kinda ironic, when you think about it. I mean, I have no problem with just being friends with her, cause I think we could be great friends. But God, I wish there was some way we could take it beyond that. I mean, she's the only girl who I like, who I ever got the feeling really liked me, and accepted me for who I am. She means so much to me, I don't even know if I can describe it in words. She's also the only girl now that I feel like I can trust.

So yeah, went over to her house yesterday for a couple hours, gave her a box of chocolates for Valentine's Day. Wanted to elaborate on how I feel to her, since I've already told her part of it, but I didn't feel comfortable doing that with her mom around.

She's goin to prom with me too, at least, that's the current plan. That's gonna be so great. There's no one else I'd rather go with.

That no dating rule really sucks though. I mean, there may be one or two other girls I like right now, but Asia's the one I really want, but it's lookin like I can't have her. But oh well, at least we can be friends, which is good enough for me. Now, if we weren't able to be friends anymore, I don't know what I'd do. I'd be really depressed, probably. But I don't think that's gonna happen. Least, I hope not.

Quote of the Day:
"Today is gonna be the day that they're gonna throw it back to you.
By now, you shoulda somehow realized what you gotta do.
I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now.
Back beat, the word is on the street that the fire in your heart is out.
I'm sure you've heard it all before but you never really had a doubt.
I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now.
And all the roads we have to walk are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I
Would like to say to you, but I don't know how
Cause maybe you're gonna be the one that
Saves me
And after all
You're my wonderwall
Today was gonna be the day, but they'll never throw it back to you
By now, you shoulda somehow realized what you're not to do
I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now
And all the roads that led us there were winding
And all the lights that light the way are blinding
There are many things that I
Would like to say to you but I don't know how
Because maybe
You're gonna be the one that
Saves me
And after all
You're my wonderwall"
-Oasis- "Wonderwall"